Sometimes, I forget how lucky I really am. I take for granted the fact that I can turn on a tap, and clean drinkable water comes out. I have cooling for when it’s hot, and heating for when it’s not. I have clean clothes, a place to sleep, and money to buy myself a mocha-chocca-chai-skinny-fair trade-no animal tested-coffee if I wish to.
And I’m pretty happy with all that. But………….(first world problem warning)…
……I want a dishwasher!
This is probably the strangest thing to desire. I mean, I’d also like to have nice skin, expensive clothing, and weigh something that didn’t make the dog bark every time he hears my screech when I get on the scales.
The dog doesn’t understand about dishwashers, but I’m sure if he did that he’d agree with me.
There are only 2 of us at home; Mr P and I; but I am convinced I could still find enough dishes to fill a dishwasher.
There are a few issues to sort out first though. You see, our kitchen is, to put it politely………dated.
The house itself was built in the early 1950’s, and the benches may have had an update in the early 70’s, but that’s the last time it’s been touched. We have a dripping tap at present that cannot be fixed, because no plumbing fixtures fit any more. It requires new pipes to connect to new fittings, and then we’d need a new sink too!
But oh, that dishwasher.
Why? Well, for starters, I could make scrambled eggs without soaking the saucepan for the next 3 days.
The chopping boards wouldn’t have yucky bits on them any more and the cutlery would be shiny, not dull and spotty like it is now.
And I would have the cleanest grill in Australia, because after Mr P has grilled chops, I would be able to just pop the grill plate in the dishwasher, instead of fighting to fit the damn thing in the sink so I can scrub it properly.
I might even have a pet name for my dishwasher. I think I’d call him “Mr Spic-and-span”. I like the way that rolls off the tongue.
I have used a dishwasher once before. Some years ago, I had a job in the kitchen of an aged-care facility for a short time. That kitchen had a dishwasher. Unfortunately, I didn’t know that you have to use a detergent specifically made for dishwashers, and you have to put it into a specific place in the dishwasher.
I’ll end that story just there!
Do you know; if we had a dishwasher, I am convinced that my bathroom would be cleaner! Yes, it’s true. I saw a video about it, you see! The video showed me that I could wash the toothbrush holder, the bath-plug, the hairbrushes and combs, the shower cap, the nail brush and even some of the light-fittings. If Mr P wasn’t looking, I might even throw the toothbrushes themselves in!
The same video demonstrated that rubber thongs were ideal dishwasher items too, as well as dog toys. The jury is out on this- I don’t wear rubber thongs, and the dog would pine badly if his beloved ball were out of his sight for more than a minute.
The truth of the matter is, we don’t really need a dishwasher. I just like the idea of having one. It’s quite possibly a reflection of a world where ‘wants’ and ‘needs’ are so easily confused. That is after all one of the greatest marketing ploys of all time, isn’t it -to convert the customer so that a want becomes a need!
In retrospect, Mr Spic-and-span is not really as important as I think he is. Not only that, I have no idea where he would fit in our kitchen; even the toaster fights for some free space.
Maybe I’ll just have to find a different way to cook scrambled eggs.
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